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Crowning the King

I once heard the late George Carlin at a live performance reel off hundreds of witty slang synonyms for masturbation, but his final entry, and the punchline for his entire performance, was,

"Crowning the King."

I thought it was the funniest.

Queen Elizabeth II: Prince Andrew! Prince Andrew! How much longer are you going to be in there?

Prince Andrew: Just a little while longer, Grand Mum.

Queen Elizabeth II: Prince Andrew! You are not endevouring to masturbate in there, are you?

Prince Andrew: Of course not, Grand Mum--I'm Crowning the King!

by Dr Whosis December 20, 2009

20👍 4👎


Crown The King

To masturbate or jack off. Comes from symbolizing the penis as a head and your fist as a crown.

Men like to crown the king to pleasure themselves.

by TheKing2 November 29, 2010

4👍 4👎


Crowning King

The act of fornication during child birth in attempt of achieving sexual euphoria for the expecting mother; vaginal penetration midst mammalian conception - i.e., a natural anesthetic used as an alternative in labor pain relief

Rather than the epidural, Matthew willingly preformed the almighty Crowning King, maneuvering his penis between the unborn baby's cranium and inside of Jacqueline's vagina, stimulating her clitoris. He's the man!

by dashibbymeister November 12, 2009

5👍 4👎


I would hit that so hard the next person to pull me out would be crowned King of England

When a girl is so hot that screwing her could be nothing other than mythic or legendary.

That is the hottest girl I've ever seen. I would hit that so hard the next person to pull me out would be crowned King of England.

by AirRon October 11, 2007

343👍 57👎


crown king arizona

Crown King Arizona- a cool place in the back roads of northern Arizona.

A great place to get away from everyday bull shit.

Get yo drink on at the brothel in Crown King Arizona.

by Some Puerto Rican dude February 4, 2016