Cuddle Whipped

(n.) A disease affecting males who fail to make it to homebase with a long term girlfriend.

Symptoms include: consistently cuddling in lieu of copulating, ditching friends to go cuddle, faking stomach aches to drive 300 miles to not get laid, and turning down college pussy for a high-school amateur who won't fuck.

(adj.) used by concerned friends of the affected male to describe his erratic behavior, also as a spiteful insult.

Example 1:
(at a party)

Guy 1: Yo man you wanna sign up for beer pong?

Cuddle Whipped guy: Nah man i got a stomach ache I think I'm gonna go home.

Guy 1: alright its still kinda early but whatever, I'll hit you up tommorow.

(the next morning)

Guy 1: Yo you feeling better yet, everyone from the party is going to the Diner for breakfast. Wanna meet us there?

Cuddle Whipped guy: Nah man I drove down to the beach to be with my girl last night.

Guy 1: Wtf haven't you been broken up for 2 months?

Cuddle whipped guy: yeah man.

Guy 1: you get laid at least?

Cuddle Whipped guy: no.

25👍 6👎

Cuddle whipped

When the dick/pussy game isn't enough to keep her around but you cuddle enchantingly enough that it is the soul purpose the person of interest can't leave you alone

Yeah we hooked up but I know the only reason she/he hasn't stopped calling is because I have her/him cuddle whipped