Dan Caddick

There is very little known about this being. Simply put, Dan Caddick is proof that there is indeed a higher power somewhere out there. The most aesthetically pleasing man to walk the Earth, able to seduce any woman who so much lays eyes on him. It's speculated that he is the root reason that envy and jealously even exist amongst men in the first place. Rumour has it that his cock rivals in length the city of Paris and that it was in fact his cumshot that was responsible for the nuking of two Japanese cities during 1945 in World War 2, but this was later covered up by NATO. It is believed that Dan Caddick originated from the Bermuda Triangle and that he is in fact the younger brother of Godzilla, who turned on him due to jealousy over his beauty and immense cock size. The KGB believes that he was indeed captured and held in Area 51 for a brief period of time, but was extracted by a specialist team lead by Dylan Ashworth and the motive remains unknown. Reports estimate him as being millions of years old as hieroglyphics depict him putting dinosaurs in headlocks and being the shit out of them. A lot remains unknown about Dan Caddick. Well renowned professor Dr Lewis Whitehouse and his team remain determined to investigate into this enigma further.

Man 1: Hey why did your girl leave you?

Man 2: Dan Caddick.