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A porn-star who probably once liked Dora the Explorer.
A: Dude, did you watch yesterday's episode of Dora the Explorer?
B: NO. I watched Dora the Explored.
A: What's that?
C: It's a goddamn porn-star.
39👍 8👎
Literally an insult to ANYONE'S intelligence. This isn't for pre-schoolers, this is for people in comas. The show includes an annoying Spanish girl that constantly does dangerous, stupid shit and has parents that apparently approve of said dangerous, stupid shit. Way to teach the kids, asshole. Then, as if they haven't been stupifying us enough with their inane bullshit, they ask the most obvious questions, and (in case you are blind or dead) point them out in the most obvious manner. For example, Dora asks "Where is Benny the Bull's farm?" Suddenly, the camera pans the the side until there is nothing left BUT the barn. Then, a tornado comes down to draw your attention to the spot where the barn is, while a giant flashing arrow points directly at it. And then, as if we (or the children, or whatever) were to dumb to find it, a shitty blue cursor "beats us to the punch" as the little bitch mockingly congratulates us on a job well done. Fuck you, you little shit! Also, Dora travels along with a gay little monkey (no offense intended, I'm just pointing out he's gay) that is literally incapable of anything but whinning and bitching the entire fucking show. Then, at least once a show, they run into the residental badass, Swiper the fox, who steal items from them and conviniently tosses them into a pile of similar items - that is, unless Dora, Boots and of course, you utter out the phrase "Swiper, don't swipe it" three times, which causes the sneaky fox to snap his fingers mafia-style and run away like a pussy. Wow, a real gangsta, that one. If I was Swiper, I'd bite Dora's tits of and shove them down Boot's mouth. Then I'd break my own neck on a tree for being such a pansy. What a shit show.
HELLO, AMIGOS! CAN YOU FIND BOOTS?! THAT'S RIGHT, HE'S RIGHT UP MY ASS!
*click*
3440👍 508👎
ur blind cause she asks us WhErE iS tHe ReD bArN, WHEN IT IS RIGHT BEHIND U BITCH
Dora the explorer is the blindest person I have met.
A stupid girl who travels with a stupid monkey
and a talking map
Dora The Explorer is gey
11👍 2👎
Reasons that Dora the Explorer is an illegal.
1) She speaks spanish... she speaks spanish perfectly... what is she like...5? Her backpack even speaks spanish perfectly!
2) That backpack of hers has EVERYTHING in it! And we're talking everything! Life support, water/food, clothing for any weather, ropes, grappling hooks, shoes.... i mean c'mon!
3) She's carrying a freaking ZOO with her! I mean, she has a monkey, an band of insects, a bajillion other animals! Really! What kind of legal immigrant has that many pets!?
4) She's always on an "adventure" to transport a "package" to some destination and is always being stalked by a person trying to take that package... i mean... really, Swiper is so obviously some sort of border patrol person trying to collect evidence of Dora's entire narcotics trafficking buisness
5) "Exploradora" is Latin for the word spy. Coincidence? Don't think so...
830👍 296👎
A young mexican (or the like) girl who has ODed on on shrooms, 'cause she is always seen singing to inanimate objects, such as, her backpack and a map. Also, the subject of bestiality and Dora often comes up because of her questionable relationship with a purple monkey named Boots, that wears red boots on his feet. It is also questionable, the whole thing with "Swiper" the fox, she always wards him away. He doesn't really do anything, except throw things. Perhaps he was an ex of the appearing four-year-old.
Dora: +Spaces.+
Boots: Uh...Dora, the kids are watching. +Poke.+
Dora: What? Oh! Hola, mi amigos...
Boots: C'mon Dora, we need to go see our Dealer!
Dora: Si, chango pelon!
Boots: I'm not bald.
Dora: +Laughs.+ Come on, vamanos, everybody, let's go!
Boots: Wait, dumbass. We don't know which way to go. Especially when we're screwed up. Ask the map, ask the map!
Dora: Oh. Right. Say Map!
861👍 347👎
A 4 or 5 year old drunken "explorer" who can't tell left from right or up from down. She has a monkey who is her companion and a backpack. The monkey's name is Boots. He doesn't stop complaining the WHOLE episode. He makes people throw rocks at the screen! Now, the backpack is also annoying. It gets the map out and then the map starts screaming "I'M THE MAP" 50 million times until your ears are bleeding. Then it shows you 3 locations. Only 3! How gay. Then you are asked how to get there and you have to scream into the TV just so the map can hear you.
When Dora is on her adventure she runs into Swiper The Fox He'll steal something and then Dora will act all "mature".
She'll point at him like a homo and scream "Swiper No Swiping!" until you scream"Shut up you butt!" Then Swiper gets all sad and says "Aw man!" Then he snaps his fingers.
Dora is not educational. At all.
Dora: Come on! Let's explore!
Swiper: I got ya map!
Dora: SWIPER NO SWIPING!
Swiper: *snaps* Aw man!
Dora the Explorer sucks.
544👍 224👎