Elmira, New York

If it weren't for the prison industry, and the trash shipped into our landfill, this town would have died long ago. Good bye high paying factory jobs, jazz clubs, social outlets and simple pride. Hello psych center rejects, crack heads, criminals, relocated prison families and self serving conservative politicians. Drive right by this fucking hell hole. Visit Corning or Ithaca where you won't feel guilty for wasting your time and money. Where else would they tear down the Langdon Mansion and install a fucking strip mall, then have the balls to claim Mark Twain as their own. The most backward thinking town I have ever lived in. Those painting a prettier picture of this god forsaken place are deluded at best. If you MUST stop, take a shit on Main Street, it won't be noticed.

While vacationing in the Finger Lakes...

Little Jimmy: Mommy, mommy are we there yet?

Mommy: No, not yet Little Jimmy, we'll be making a quick stop in Elmira, New York to get rid of our trash, buy some crack and take a shit on Main Street.

Little Jimmy: Gee Mommy, I think I'll hold mine 'til I get to Binghamton.

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