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Anthony-Yo' Bruva, I got all dis mail stuf. Wat duz dat mean?
Jamal-Dam Cuzin', tiday mus be "I be ur daddy day"
156👍 35👎
The day in which you fuck someone's dad.
Friends: "Did you celebrate Father's day?"
Me: "Ohh, yes I did."
Friends: "Wanna sit down and talk about it?"
Me: "I can't, My ass still hurts."
8👍 3👎
The day where you start to see how big of a gentleman ya father really is.What?Your father doesn't just say "You don't bring me anything" like he does for me every year?Wow,you guys must be having a bad time whenever June comes over.At least it's still March :) but then there's mother's day.Come on guys,go prepare!
Friend:So I bought USA's strongest tank,some deodorant that is guaranteed to get my stepdad all them girls,and some new manly ass shoes that will ironically make other shoes dirty instead of themselves when being stepped on.All that for June 21st.
Me:Duuuuuude,chill.Father's day is just a day.That's way too much stuff to buy for a day.Plus,your mom was out of her damn mind when she decided to marry that selfish idiot.
Friend:You talkin' trash about my parents?Let's see what karma has to say about this.
Karma:Hey what's up guys it's biggie cheese.
Friend:Wrong line!
Me:Does this happen every single year?Anyway,in father's day,my father be like: "You don't have to bring me anything." It just really frustrates me! *Proceeds to talk some nonsense for the next ten minutes*
Friend:I have been successfully convinced to hate father's day now.
4👍 1👎
Not A Father's Day is a holiday dedicated to the celebration and commemoration of an often forgotten segment of our country's population: the not fathers. These brave men have chosen to remain childless, despite an avalanche of pressure, expectations, and condemnation, propagated by the Saturday morning cartoon loving elite, the Minivan Clan, and Maury Povich.
Guy #1: Happy "Not A Father's Day", the only thing I'll be nursing at any given 2 AM, is a Scotch!
Guy #2: Amen to that!
30👍 2👎
A holiday for all non-fathers around the world to celebrate being not a father. To celebrate that moment of happiness when your one-night stand says, "I'm not pregnant!"
First Lady: I'm not pregnant!
President: YES, I declare today NOT A FATHER'S DAY! Hooray!!!
109👍 33👎
a second, peculiar type of Mother's Day for all of the single mothers who also have to be fathers to their children.
Mama said that Mother's Day is a celebration of her natural maternal instincts as a single parent and Father's Day represents the more masculine, paternal qualities she's had to learn since she's had to raise us on her own.
177👍 62👎
Father's Day: the third Sunday in June appointed for the honoring of middle management. Also known as the one day a year middle management gets to "call the ball". A way to platitudinaly appease someone who's really needy
Richard's bust out brother has a really bad business idea that he wants to present to my boss , so I'll give him a gratatudinal "Father's Day meeting"
24👍 6👎