Feral Stacy

Feral Stacy is widely considered to be one of the most beautiful of the ape like creatures. Unlike Yeti and Abominable Snowmen, Feral Stacys are unusually attractive. Unlike other primates, the fangs of Feral Stacys are brilliant white. They also lack the pronounced K9s of other predators. Feral Stacys inhabit the Southern United States, although they have been sighted as far West as Colorado, and perhaps the Hawaiian Islands. (citation needed)

While Feral Stacys are bipedal, primates, they share many habits and characteristics of felines. For example, they are nocturnal. They are most active after dark, sometimes sleeping for only 2 hours in a 24 hour period. Young Stacys are playful and mischievous, and are sometimes called “kittens.” Older Stacys are skilled hunters, earning the nickname “cougar.” Feral Stacys roam the woods and streams and are rarely spotted in the wild. It is unknown if Feral Stacys can thrive in captivity. Feral Stacys have few natural enemies; coyotes, which compete for the same food sources and bears, which seem to terrify them. The social habits of Feral Stacys are a mystery. They seem to enjoy snuggling, cuddling, and other displays of affection. They have been known to capture and toy with their prey in much the same way as an Orca interacts with a baby seal. In the last several years, several online communities have formed, solely for the purpose of studying the habits and activities of Stacys.

Person One: “I saw a Feral Stacy in the woods behind my grandma’s house.”
Person Two: “Bo, let’s go catch it and try to tame it. We can keep it in the garage and feed it cat food.”
Person One: “Nah brah, those things are dangerous. Let’s just go to the basement and play video games.”

Feral Stacy

This beautiful creature has a long blonde flowing mane and blue eyes. At night, her eyes and teeth glow in the dark. She is barefoot and wears a grass skirt. She can be found looking for her next victim on lands where grown men hunt deer and hogs in hopes of putting meat in their freezers. Many say this creature is cat like and may possess whiskers like it’s cat cousins but no one knows for sure since a Feral Stacy has never been caught. There have been many men who thought they caught a Feral Stacy only to be disappointed. This creature mostly roams the land at dusk. The Feral Stacy possibly may be tamed. It is suggested to exercise extreme caution as the Feral Stacy is out to consume a man’s heart. It is best to capture her before she captures you. You will not regret capturing a Feral Stacy if you are able to. Once she is fed, bathed, and domesticated she will be the most loyal creature you have ever had in your possession. (We are speculating.) This creature enjoys snuggling and taking naps just like her cat cousin. She spends a lot of time in her bed in the wild which is made up of Turkey feathers, grass, and fur from animals that have shed in summer. She doesn’t like to have her belly tickled so if you catch a Feral Stacy, this is extremely useful information. It’s only wild enemy is the coyote. The coyote tries to sneak up on the Feral Stacy any chance it can. If you see a coyote, you are probably danger close to a lurking Feral Stacy.

Billy Bob: “Hey Bo! Did you have any photos of that Feral Stacy on your trail camera?”
Bo: “Naw, all I had was a coyote and some deer.”
Billy Bob: “Well, I’m thinkin about going and sitting near your stand because if there’s a coyote nearby it must be hot on the trail of a Feral Stacy”.