Flat Asian Butt Syndrome

Flat Asian Butt Syndrome (FABS), also known as Asian Booty Disease, is a benign medical condition that develops in over 95% of both males and females of Asian descent. The condition affects the entire gluteal region and is irreversible but not life-threatening. Symptoms include lack of volume and abnormal flatness. Typical complications are not being able to participate in popular dances such as twerking and not being able to fill out pants.

Sara: "I want to learn how to twerk."

Thomas: "With your pronounced case of Flat Asian Butt Syndrome, I think it would be a waste of time."