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Fort Wainwright

A place of endless turmoil where the only treasure you will find is in a local tundra wookies meat wallet. On the greatest of occasions you will be able to partake in a platoon push on one of the aforementioned tundra wookies in the asbestos filled barracks. Occasionally you will run into a moose while in the field and do nothing but drink your sorrows away during the never ending winter

I took it personally when the army sent me to Fort Wainwright

by muskrat mayhem June 25, 2010

14👍 3👎


Fort Wainwright

Fort Wainwright
A place where privates come to Die and testicles come to get frostbite. A place that only exists to this day because the community of Fairbanks natives throw beer bottles at military vehicles; survives solely off of the taxes of the military institution. Without the base the town wouldn't exist. Waking up in Fort Ain't Right is like waking up wishing there was a muzzle of a 3.57 in your esophagus. Here you can find alcoholic soldiers , and NCO's that take there Marital problems out on every rank below them and justify there mistakes by blaming it on them. This is what they call the Hunting and fishing brigade, and in the winter time when it's Negative 60 degrees and your practicing Battle drill 1 be cautious not to get a cold weather injury, because even if CIF doesn't issue you the proper cold weather gear, it will still be your fault for getting a cold weather injury. As a single soldier you will find yourself among the shittiest details, taking tours to Sand-bagistan to fill 10,000 sandbags , while your friends are deploying, you're setting up 20 year old targets for outdated training ranges that are constantly shut down by range control civilians, turning 2 day field problems into 5 day problems. Training is mediocre and only done so higher ups can write down on a piece of paper that their unit is "Qualified" to "Deploy" to a fake training deployment called"Pacific pathways" to make soldiers feel like they are doing something important.

Last night at fort Wainwright I stared at a bottle of Clorox debating whether or not to drink all of it because I knew it would kill me if I did.

by AnAtropianVet August 21, 2018

3👍 2👎