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Hori Cannon

A cherished New Zealand custom, almost as old as time itself, where a child is produced out of seemingly thin air to further strain the welfare system.

Those close to the Hori couple in question, are left in darkness as the duration of the gestational period is kept remarkably below the radar, regardless of social outings or day to day interactions

To the surprise of all, a fully haired spawn is seemingly cannoned into the picture, devoid of any recollection of a pregnancy period or announcement.

Where once was a trendy couple, now stands a proverbial pop-tart family.

Me: Who's baby is that mate? Are you sitting for your sis?
Hori Guy: Surprise! The misso and I have a new little fella to introduce...
Hori Girl: He's such a blessing
Me: You've been packing the Hori Cannon! A rapid shot of spawn that has demolished my understanding of your relationship!
Hori Guy: Whatever man, we're off to claim benefits. Catch.

by The phantom tanner March 12, 2019

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