Hosepipe Ban

The sad state of affairs of being without sex, and being unlikely to have it any time soon. Period of sexual drought/celibacy, whether "by choice" or enforced.

"If this hosepipe ban goes on for much longer, I may have to start going to Jumpin' Jaks'"

"She looks miserable, must be on a hosepipe ban again"

"Oh my god, he's gorgeous! He could lift my hosepipe ban anytime".

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Hosepipe Ban

When you have an argument with a fuck buddy, and prevent him/her from having sex temporarily. Typically ranges from 2-4 weeks, or until the banner gets drunk and horny. Not to be confused with ending a 'friends with benefits' relationship.

"I'm so horny ... but Ray is on a hosepipe ban, so I'm just gonna have to masturbate this weekend"