if you ever

phrase

used as a response to something that you don't want said or done

shortened from "if you ever say that embarrassing statement in front of people" or "if you ever dance like that in public"

person 1: "hey remember the time when you ripped your pants trying to touch your toes at the gym"

person 2: "if you ever"

8👍 1👎

Have you ever

a drinking game, where someone asks a question that begins with have you ever, for example "have you had sex in a public place?" All the people who have who are participating in the game must therefore drink.

"Have you ever made out wiht Adrian fielding?"
Everyone looks at eachother guiltyly and drinks :)

37👍 16👎

Do Not You Evers

"Whitewashed" or Educated African Americans. Along the same lines as "Dont chu evas" except since their educated, they pronounce the words correctly.

Those Do Not You Evers think they are the sh*t.

7👍 14👎

Have You Ever Had A Dream

A sentence a kid said on tv while having a stroke.

“Have you ever had a dream that, that, um, that you had, uh, that you had to, you could, you do, you wit, you wa, you could do so, you do you could, you want, you wanted him to do you so much you could do anything?”

15👍 2👎

You ever held a thousand dollars ?

Verbal : What you tell a bitch that’s acting too good too fuck, but you know she wants to fuck, and you trynna fuck, so you bring up money.

Bitch have you ever held a thousand dollars ?

If you ever step on my patch...

The pre-text to a phrase threatening anyone who 'steps on your patch'.

Person 1: Hey can I step on your patch?
Person 2:If you ever step on my patch... I'll bring you down, I'll bring you down...

Also the only lyrics to a song by Jim Noir, and music used in the video game Little Big Planet.

14👍 7👎

Have you ever considered a Ploughmans?

The question you should ask when you are too intoxicated to think of a sandwich other than salami.

"What are you eating, is it a salami sandwich?"
"Yes pal"
"Have you ever considered a Ploughmans?"