Inferiority stick

The penis, by far the ugliest part of the human body. Its ugliness is a stark reminder that girls are superior to boys, especially when compared to the Lovely (capital L) sight of cameltoe.

Amanda: You seriously would die to stop another man from raping me, even if you knew my life wasn't at risk? That's so sweet!

Henry: Of course, because you're my friend. And while I didn't choose to be born with an inferiority stick, I did choose to be a good friend to my female friends!