James Mattis

With a knife hand whose casualty-kill radius spanning the known universe, the US secretary of offense will end your paltry existence with a mere glance. Noted for saying "Be polite, be professional, and have a plan to kill everyone in the room," and "Nothing keeps me awake at night, I keep other people awake at night. For him killing people is a hell of a hoot, for which he can't be blamed. The warrior monk is even rumored to be the reincarnation of good ol' chesty puller himself. There's a reason why no one has seen them in a room together.

NCOs: "Looking at James Mattis gives me the biggest wargasm since seeing the Highway of death."
Officers: "Wow what a great leader."
Boots: "OOOOORRAAHHH!!! *eats crayons*"

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