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Jay the boomer

A specific male species who wears women's zip up pants and thinks that he is quirky. He has no idea his girlfriend is his biggest stan, because he did not know what stan meant until yesterday. He thinks weather stations are the coolest invention on the planet even cooler than his bigger and better phone which is neither of those, but at least better than the one he drowned in Balaton. He has been called old more times than he has showed up anywhere on time and his beard and extroverted personality make him a professional creep. He drinks more beer and eats more food than the population of Australia, where he possibly came out of the womb with thongs already on his feet. He is a cheapskate at heart, but makes exceptions when it comes to The North Face, which he wears 24/7 including on a sailing boat, which he uses as a flex of his captain skills. His memory is worse than his dad jokes, which cause his girlfriend to shake her head. He will not remember this entry in 50 years but at least his girlfriend had a good time ditching her TOK work to write this for him.

Despite being Jay the boomer his girlfriend loves him endlessly and cannot wait to be bullied for this crime.

by crikeycrackhead November 22, 2021