JEREMY CLARK

1. A combination-phrase/name of a certain CELEBRITY HAIR STYLIST; the first name JEREMY is thought to be a reference to RON JEREMY. The last name, CLARK, references a popular brand of PIRATE boots and/or footwear.

2. The initials "JC" often imply a royal ancestry that can be traced from JARVIS COCKER to JESUS CHRIST.

3. A combination of the name: JEREMY, derived from the ancient AZTEC (pronounced: Ass-Tech) word for telling a whopper: JEREMIAH. And the word CLARK, which refers to a disguised Super-Hero in a phone booth. IE: "To be a CLARK KENT Lit. Translation: "A Lying-AZTEC-Disguised-as-a-Friendly-Journalist."

4. Can also be used in reference to someone with PROPHETIC powers and a cartoon alter-ego Caped Crusader. Ie: "He who speaketh of naked-ness, yet remaineth caped." From the OLD TESTAMENT Apocryphal Erotic Book Series: "CLARK KENT HAS A HUGE JEREMIAH!" and the NEW TESTAMENT: "THE FURTHER ADVENTURES OF JEREMY IN CLARKSON."

5. A rumoured SHADOW PIRATE, and devoted PASTAFARIAN disguised as a mellow-mannered HAIR STYLIST from NORTH HOLLYWOOD.

6. A deadly pirate who likes to scalp his victims employing a scissor-move with 2 swords.

Girl 1: "I hear he has a large JEREMY...."
Girl 2: "And I love that he wears CLARKS... I'd let him walk all over me!"

Favorite Quote: "I am not JESUS. But I have the same initials....

Overheard in a bar: "Jeremy Clarked in my face last night right after he took all my BOOTY. After which he dubbed me his one-eyed PIRATE PRINCESS and smacked me in the nose with his SWORD.

Response: "That's DIRTY Sanchez. Go wash your face."

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