Jerk Theory

The theory that a girl is more likely to become attracted to a guy who is a complete tool and treats her with little to none respect over a nice guy.

I bought her some flowers but when she answered the door there was some jerk there too. He just handed me a book on the Jerk Theory.

Random Jerk Theory

Refers to the unpredictable, yet constant, verbal references to the phallus in a conversation between two males. (Derives from the "Random Walk Theory" of economics)

"Jerk me off!" "Time for a circle-jerk!" "Masturbate me, why don't you?" "Sounds like a reach-around to me!" "My dick's bigger than yours." "I'm getting rammed by this (i.e. exam, IRS, alimony/child-support, etc.) today."

5👍 7👎