John Corduroy

A man who despises anything other than corduroy pants. He has the ability to infinitely generate corduroy pants, and morph them into any recognizable man-made object. The source of all of his corduroy pants is unknown.

HE HATES SLACKS.

Guy 1: We need to hide, man. I heard John Corduroy just escaped from the Slack Slammer.
Guy 2: OH SHIT OH FUCKING ASS HELL OH SHIT

John Corduroy: I'm kill.