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kalashnikov

Last name of Russian small-arms designer Mikhail T. Kalashnikov. His seminal design was adopted by the Soviet Army in 1947 (although not fielded for a few years) as "Avtomat Kalashnikova" of 1947, or, "Automatic Rifle of (by) Kalashnikov", abbreviated to AK-47. It is a milestone in firearms design, combining an incredibly robust, soldier-proof design with relatively light weight. The ergonomics, like many Soviet-era designs, are somewhat lacking. The rifle is chambered for an "intermediate-power" cartridge, the 7.62x39mm, which is comparable to the 19th-century .30-30 Winchester. In 1959, the design was modernized and upgraded and the name changed to AKM (Avtomat Kalashnikova Modernizirovannyj; Automatic rifle of Kalashnikov, modernized). This design and its various folding-stock versions was standard issue for all Warsaw Pact countries until 1974, when it was modified yet again to take a new (and arguably less effective) cartridge, the 5.45x39mm, and became the AK-74. All of these rifles are generically termed "AKs" or "Kalashnikovs".
Mikhail Kalashnikov, while a Hero of The Soviet Union, made exactly zero money from the 50 million or so AKs made, and owns no part of the Ihzvesk plant that currently makes the bulk of Russia's AK models.

"The AK-47! When you absolutely, positively have to kill every motherfucker in the room - accept no substitutes!"
- Samuel L. Jackson, in "Jackie Brown"

by Da September 17, 2004

189๐Ÿ‘ 15๐Ÿ‘Ž


Kalashnikov

A card game created by the YouTuber Life Of Boris where 2 players sit down and see who can build an AK-47 out of cards the quickest. Then they fight to the death by rolling dice or another more advanced way. You must get 20 points to kill your opponent.

You: *gets ak47*
You: KALASHNIKOV CYKA!!!

by GopnikToast April 9, 2020


kalashnikov

Well known as the name of a Soviet-era Russian machine gun, a cocktail drank in many former Soviet countries such as Lithuania and Russia is named it after it.
To make the cocktail:
1. Fill a shot glass 3/4 full of vodka
2. Cut a lemon slice so that you may rest it on top of the shot glass covering half of the opening.
3. Put sugar (and cinnamon if you wish for more flavor, but the cinnamon is not necessary) on top of the lemon slice.
4. Fill the rest of the shot glass with absinthe, pouring it so that it passes over the lemon slice.
5. Light the lemon slice on fire.
6. After the slice has burned out, take the shot and eat the lemon.

Voila, a Kalashnikov.

Example 1:
Soviet guard: I will shoot you with my Kalashnikov!

Example 2:
Lithuanian man: Bartender! One Kalashnikov, please!
Bartender: Ah, making me do some work, he he. Coming right up.

by Lietuviu Kurvis February 16, 2010

19๐Ÿ‘ 9๐Ÿ‘Ž


Kalashnikov

One of the many guns manufactured by the Russian company owned by Mikhail Kalshnikov.

Look out, the Viet-Cong use Kalashnikov AK47s!

by Rohan October 31, 2003

24๐Ÿ‘ 71๐Ÿ‘Ž


Kalashnikov

The Russian company that makes AK-47s, AK-101s, AK-102s, AK-105s, and the PKB APCMC (Amored Personnel Carrier Machine Gun).

Kalashnikovs are very powerful weapons

by Osko November 13, 2006

15๐Ÿ‘ 49๐Ÿ‘Ž


Mikhail Kalashnikov

The Soviet regimes had a manic need to display the countryโ€™s excellence to the world and especially for their own sovoks, whether the reason was the Slavic inferiority complex or whatever, for the civilized world their efforts were tragicomical, in reality it was a mere developing country with a nuclear weapon (due to the help of Western commies) and today's successor, Putinstan is basically unchanged with the same mindset.

"If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it."
Mikhail Kalashnikov also began to believe in this Soviet myth about himself as a creator of the AK 47, the quote is allegedly from Joseph Goebbels, the Minister of Propaganda in the Third Reich.

Immediately after the war, the Soviets began hunting experts in various fields from Germany for forced labor into the Soviet Union, among these thousands was also a weapon designer Hugo Schmeisser and his 15-member team and 500 other German gunsmiths, metallurgists and scientists. HS had developed the world's first usable assault rifle, the Strumgevehr 44. Kalashnikov denied having met Schmeisser ever (in the town of Izhmash), but at least once in a weak moment in an interview in 2009 he said he had "collaborated" with him - this is the good ol' Homo Sovieticus' hero-making method; talents develop a product, but the glory goes to the own peasant. Schmeisser was allowed to return to the "liberated" part of Germany in 1952 only to die the following year.

When the pompous Mikhail Kalashnikov statue was unveiled in Moscow 2017, at the same time, in a way, the real designer of the AK 47 was also unveiled, but only for a moment... The sculptor had blundered by depicting Schmeisser's designed StG 44 and its parts on the pedestal of the statue - an angle grinder was found and soon this embarrassing reminder of honest historiography was removed.

by O. W. Tongueincheek February 8, 2022

2310๐Ÿ‘ 49๐Ÿ‘Ž


Avtomat Kalashnikov

Of all the weapons in the vast soviet arsenal, nothing was more profitable than Avtomat Kalashnikova model of 1947. More commonly known as the AK-47, or Kalashnikov. It's the world's most popular assault rifle. A weapon all fighters love. An elegantly simple 9 pound amalgamation of forged steel and plywood. It doesn't break, jam, or overheat. It'll shoot whether it's covered in mud or filled with sand. It's so easy, even a child can use it; and they do. The Soviets put the gun on a coin. Mozambique put it on their flag. Since the end of the Cold War, the Kalashnikov has become the Russian people's greatest export. After that comes vodka, caviar, and suicidal novelists.

After the Cold War, the Avtomat kalashnikov -47 became Russia's biggest export. After that came vodka, caviar, and suicidal novelists.

by Cranberrytheprincipal May 21, 2006

97๐Ÿ‘ 15๐Ÿ‘Ž