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These are standard toppings for burgers & hot dogs. Nobody knows why it isn't the default toppings. Fast Food restaurants nowadays poop out these weird tomatoe, onion, lettuce toppings.
I don't want a fucking salad, I just want my god damn burger! It's not a fucking science.
Ex. 1 - the working man's fight:
(Frank) Can I have a cheeseburger, ketchup and mustard only, nothing else on it?
(five minutes later)
(Frank) WTF I paid for a burger and all you gave me were mustard and ketchup packets...
Ex. 2 - The Restaurant Enigma:
(Bob) Could I have my burger with mustard and ketchup only?
(Waitress) Oh, yes, I'll bring you a bottle of ketchup and a bottle of mustard!
(Bob) No, can you have the chef put the ketchup and mustard on? I hate having to squeeze that shit out and it takes forever. I kind of just want to eat, you know?
(Waitress) Oh, we don't do that! It's not our policy!
(Bob) Fuck your policy, it's called customer service!
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What it looks like that is left on your sheets after boinking a woman who is both on her period and has a yeast infection.
Damn! That chick I took home from the bar last night didn't say a word about her issues. I ended up with puddle of ketchup and mustard on my bed, and I didn't have time to throw my sheets in the washer this morning.
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I CANT FUCKING DO IT. THIS SHIT IS SO HARD AND SO BULLSHIT. I can't put a patty on a bun, with lettuce, cheese, onions, tomatoes, ketchup, mustard, pickles, and top bun together in that order!