Loneliness-Toucher

Someone who is so down astronomically that he will do anything for the nookie. Typically takes interest in girls who A) Are way out of his league, B) Not even straight or C) Not from the fucking country

He also thinks he's a "dreamy lover-boy type" when really, just creepy

Dude 1: "You seriously gonna pull a Loneliness-Toucher, are you?"

Dude 2: "I am what one may call, slightly down bad"