Lunch monster

The lunch monster is the thing that lingers around hell hole office spaces. It’s the thing you blame when people go out to lunch and never return to work ever again.

Guy 1: Dude where is Jim?
Guy 2: He got eaten by the “lunch monster” two days ago, but that fucker had some decency this time and regurgitate him. He now works at the big shiny tower in the city and makes bank.