M.D. Golden Rule

Can mean either MODERN DAY GOLDEN RULE or MEDICAL DOCTOR/DENTIST GOLDEN RULE. Illustrates the degraded/depraved state of the human psyche in the self-centered dog-eat-dog world of the 21st Century.
Modern Day Golden Rule:
(1) "Do unto others BEFORE they do unto you"... in other words, CLOBBER EVERYONE AROUND YOU INTO A SHAPELESS PULP SO THAT THEY CAN'T "GET" YOU FIRST! (Never mind that those other hapless mortals may not have had any thought/intention whatsoever of harming you... why take the chance???)
(2) "Do unto others IF they have done unto you"... in other words, never do anything nice or helpful for anyone unless you get PAID to do it, or unless THEY DO SOMETHING FOR YOU IN RETURN. Nunna this "charity/volunteer" or "out of the goodness of your heart" bullcrap!
(3) "Do unto others AS they have done unto you"... in other words, TAKE REVENGE! Whup their sorry butts twice as hard as they hurt you (even if they never intentionally meant to offend), or sue the pants off 'em in court!
Medical Doctor/Dentist Golden Rule: "Do unto other SO THAT THEY ARE FORCED to do unto you"... in other words, INTENTIONALLY CAUSE A HEALTH CRISIS WITH YOUR CLIENTS, so that they will then be compelled to pay you hefty fat fees to "cure" them!! Perform needless/destructive surgery, give them medicine that you know they will react allergically to, pick around on their teeth to create new cavities if none are already present, and so on.

I try very hard to just behave myself, keep a low profile, and not get sick if I can possibly help it --- there are too many human jackals out there who practice the M.D. Golden Rule.

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