masturbating in the bathroom while your roommates are out and are unsure of when they'll return; IE, maturbating while home alone.
Pun on the word "caulking" (pronounced "call-king"), the rubbery silicone sealant around tubs and sinks.
roommate: What the hell were you doing in the bathroom when I got home? You were in there for a while.
deviant: Oh just Macaulay Caulking the bathtub tiles... you didn't leave a note so I didn't know when you'd be home.
roomate: gross
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the effect on your insides,when you drink them raisin dry with lots of cheap whiskey (preferably The Great Macaulay Premium Scotch Whiskey 40 % Vol.)
A: Do you still have that horrible stomachache?!
B: It will be over soon, because tonight's gonna be macaulay caulking
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