The chorus teacher at New Paltz Middle School, Mr. Halpern appears to be 14 but according to our very reliable sources is actually 28. Tall, awkward and very nerdy, Mr. Halpern uses finger-guns more than the average twelve-year-old. His first name is William, but all students should know not to call him that to his face.
"Who's that really tall eight grader?" "Oh, that's just Mr. Halpern."