Pension Witch

An evil creature typically found in healthcare; who’s life purpose is to hypnotize and lure young Firefighters into marriage only with intent to file for divorce and steal half their hard earned retirement pension.

Rookie: That hot ER nurse gave me her number. Should I ask her out?

Captain: Keep it in your pants probie, she’s only after your pension.

Rookie: how do you know? She said she’s into me.

Captain: She can’t help it. She’s a Pension Witch. She’ll sell your motorcycle and use the cash to buy into a Pyramid scheme.