Post-Traumatic Choke Disorder

An anxiety disorder that is triggered from witnessing one's team choke, whether that be a spring training game, season game, or playoff game. Symptoms include:

-Fair weather sportsmanship
-Ranting about the choke
-Afraid to watch any games
-Making excuses to not watch a game (playing video games, homework, on the computer)
-Avoidance of talk about recent games
-Loss of faith in team
-Low self-esteem, unable to defend team from rival fans

Example 1:

Joe: Dammit! The Cubs just keep losing!

Kel: Screw this, I'm gonna go to the bar!

Few minutes later...

Joe: Yes! We tied it!

(Kel runs in the room)

Kel: Alright! They're unstoppable!

Joe: Damn, Kel. No need to hide your PTCD.

Example 2:

Joe: Hey, the Pats won last night!

Kel: Fuck the Pats! All they ever do is fucking lose! We won Super Bowl Fucky-Two! The Giants weren't actually that fucking good enough! It was one of our fucking players!

Joe: Chill, Kel!

Kel: Sorry. Post-Traumatic Choke Disorder.

Example 3:

Joe: Hey, Kel! You gonna watch the ALDS tonight?

Kel: No, I'm probably gonna go out with Jane.

Joe: I thought you broke up with Jane?

Kel: Dammit! My PTCD's acting up again!

Example 4:

Joe: Hey, the Cubs played an amazing game last night!

Kel: Um, can we not talk about the Cubs right now? I happened to miss the game.

Joe: PTCD?

Kel: Yup.

Example 5:

Marvin: Yo, Boston sucks!

Kel: Yeah, whatever.

Joe: Dude, don't take that from him!

Kel: Who cares? I've lost confidence!

Joe: Stop it with the PTCD!

Example 6:

I myself happen to be a sufferer of PTCD. Since the Pats' loss in Super Bowl 42, I have been petrified of ever watching another sports game. The one time I watched a Red Sox game after that was when they choked to the White Sox during a home game in 2010. Since then, I have suffered a double dose of the disorder.

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