A professional procrastinator. Is somehow able to do everything at the last minute. Somehow this person, at this elite level of procrastination, manages to get projects, assignments, and jobs done within 5 minutes of their respective deadlines.
Is known to stay up all night frequently. With the assistance of red bull.
Dude 1: "Man, look at you. Always scrambling to get stuff done at the last minute. What in the world do you do at home?"
Dude 2: "Well, it depends on the weather. But in general, I sit around doing nothing. Or surfing the web sometimes, but usually.... nada."
Dude 1: "Dude you're a proprocrastinator. How do you do it?"
Dude 2: "If I told you then I'd have to sequester you on a remote island in the Pacific with nothing except three twinkies."
Dude 1: "Gotcha."
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