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Schrodinger's Project Manager

A workplace phenomenon where resources assigned to a project are simultaneously worthless and invaluable, where the act of interacting with the project manager forces a classification.

"I know it's not something we normally do, and I know you're not responsible for it, however can you perform this backlog of clerical tasks?"

"I just don't have enough resources allocated to my team, I'm missing my deliverables and I'll need more of your time"

Person 1: "I can't believe our PM made us attend that four hour meeting... We told them we didn't have anything to contribute, and they're telling me they need my pull request in by tomorrow because the project is behind"
Person 2:"Yup, Schrodinger's Project Manager"

by Bob Costas' Gym Teacher July 2, 2020