Sergeant Baker

A botched taper or fade haircut that looks like a military-style buzz cut.

Dirk: Hey, nice haircut... but I thought you were joining the Peace Corps, not the Marine Corps.

Lance: Yeah, the dumbass at Great Clips gave me a Sergeant Baker even though just asked him to clean up the sides.

Dirk: Well, it will grow back... I guess.

Lance: Yeah, let's go get some fuckin' pancakes.