Shit paralysis

The inability to move from having to shit extremely bad.

Having to poop so bad if you move you're going to poop your pant.

I was stuck at the bottom of the stairs, suffer from shit paralysis.

I was stuck at the bathroom door with shit paralysis for like 5 minutes.

Post-shit Paralysis

The feeling of utter ecstasy when you let out a toilet-snake that's been brewing all day (or possibly longer). Side-effects include dizziness, drowsiness, empty thoughts, and most of all, euphoria.

Person 1: Jesus christ, man, are you okay? Are you having a bad case of Post-shit Paralysis?
Person 2: Haha.... yeah.... i-i'm fiiine. *(promptly falls asleep)*