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Silent Football

A gentlemans game not to be mentioned except between other gentlemen, and should not be mentioned on "muggle" sites like this

I traveled to San Fransisco while studying Sig Freud last night
(any words that start with S and F stand for Silent Football

by Mr. Kroaky September 1, 2010

45👍 12👎


Silent Football

A complicated game which origins date all the way back to the 5th and 6th centuries. Its true creators' identity is unknown, but some believe the game was invented by none other than King Arthur the Great. To play, one must know a Player. A Player is one who has mastered the skill, or has otherwise participated in a game of Silent Football taught by another, and so on. Basically it's similar to the Free Masons. While not being able to list the exact gameplay or rules, it is fairly simple to find Players around you. Just yell, "Hey! What is Silent Football?" Many people will immediately come up to you and teach you. It is not hard to become a Player yourself, but may I say, while it is an honor, it is most definitely a curse. Proceed with caution. You will know what I mean.

Example: "Hey Mike, wanna play Silent Football?"

"Sure man. Gather the others. We will meet in the ally by Krispy Kreame. Don't let anyone follow you, but if they do....well you know what to do."

by thefuzeghost April 19, 2017


silent football

A game with a very strict set of rules. It is ran by Mr. Dick Tater. Players may call him any variation of the words dick, and potato. The game is started with the customary tip-of-the-hat, and the customary shaloob. The ball is then put in play by Mr. Tallywhacker Beerfries. Players may "thwap", by slapping their thighs in the direction they wish to send the ball. Players may not alter the direction of the thwapping. Players may also "Zoom" by making eye-contact with another player, and pointing their elbow at the player. Players cannot "thwap a thwap thwap", or Use a thwap three times in rapid succession, unless it is all done by one player, before anyone else has thwapped. This also goes for Zooming. Players must raise their hand and be called on by Mr. Penis Potato. All players must address each other with the Title of Mr. or Ms.. Players may not use any pronouns. The breaking of any rules is rewarded with Penance points. The player with the most penance points at the end of the game "wins" and must do a dare.

Paul: Hey, lets play silent football!

Group: HELL YEAH! I'm sick of contact.

Paul: I call Dick-tater. Customary tip of the hat!

Group: customary tip of the hat

Paul: Customary shaloob

Group: Customary shaloob

Paul: The ball is now in play, all rules are now in effect.

by Matthew Raymond Keller August 17, 2008

36👍 21👎


silent football

A game played mainly by men. People sit in a circle and follow a strict code of rules. There are many rules and defining them here is in essence, against the rules. The game is lost by accumulating the most points. The loser usually must complete a task decided by the other players of the game.

After playing a game of SF mike had to strip and start singing.

by Mike June 22, 2004

49👍 38👎


silent football

A game with a very strict set of rules. It is ran by the Grand Master. Players must call him Grand Master. The game is started with the customary tip-of-the-hat, and the customary shaloob. The ball is then put in play by the Grand Master. Players may "thwap", by slapping their thighs in the direction they wish to send the ball. Players may not alter the direction of the thwapping. Players may also "Zoom" by making eye-contact with another player, and pointing their elbow at the player or any other way of pointing or motioning to another player. Players cannot "thwap a thwap thwap", or Use a thwap three times in rapid succession, unless it is all done by one player, before anyone else has thwapped. This also goes for Zooming. If any type of motion is used three times in a row, a Penance Point is given. Players must raise their hand and be called on by the Grand Master. All players must address each other with the Title of Mr. or Ms. Players may not use any pronouns. The breaking of any rules is rewarded with Penance points. The player with the most penance points at the end of the game "wins" and must do a dare.

silent football?

sure turn off the lights, find a lantern and gather round

by fishboy July 14, 2020


silent football

The second best game in the world. Played when there's too much food on backpacking trips. The players adhere to an extremely strict set of rules, and when a rule is broken, other players ask the Duke or Duchess if they may speak, and when granted permission, they state who they think has broken the rule. The Duke or Duchess then decides if they should recieve penance, in other words, extra food. It's pretty awesome.

"We have way too much food and no one wants to eat it. Looks like we're going to have to play Silent Football."
*the game ensues..*
"Lady Duchess Lauren with the Long Lingering Locks of the Lost Coast, may I speak?"
"Yes, Lady Sonia, you may."
"I believe that Lord Dave was blaming his own flatulence problems on my person."
"I agree, and for that he shall recieve penance."
(Everyone is greatly amused, and Dave gets another bowl of the nasty rice and chili mix)

by la maravillosa September 8, 2006

14👍 29👎


Silent Football

A rules and argument-based social game played in a circle with several players, the first player to aquire three strikes loses and must perform a punishment decided on by the other players

"Dude let's play silent football!"
"Noooo, last time we played I had to sing 'I'm a little teapot' in front of everyone!"

by Voidless void May 12, 2024