Soldotna

A small town in Alaska as ugly as hell. The majority of the population have a meth lab in their basement. Soldotna has a horrible junior a hockey team called the brown bears. There is a Fred meyers there. Other than that there isn't much there.

Astronaut 1: what the hell is all of that shit spewing out of the earth?
Astronaut 2: Soldotna

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Soldotna

A bustling town on the Kenai Peninsula in Alaska. Known for its absolute devotion to Sarah Palin and cheesy tourism promotions. It is a nice place to visit, but if you stick around you'll probably want to commit an hero.

Tourist: "Soldotna is the king salmon capital of the world!"

Resident: "I dont give a fuck."

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