St Austell

One of the largest towns in Cornwall, St Austell is a old mining town turned shopping mecca. Due to to recent developments to the town centre St Austell has changed from a boring shithole to an expensive boring shithole. Notable locations include Gover, a chav infested rat-hole at the bottom of town, and the somewhat ridiculous rivalry between the two secondary schools - Poltair and Penrice. Both are equally crap, the only difference is that one has wannabe scum and the other has stupid scum. St Austell has one of the nicest primary schools ever - Pondhu.

Other interesting facts include that anybody who is a nice or decent person in St Austell lives on the outskirts - since the overwhelming chaviness of the rest of the town tends to change decent people into monsters obsessed with tracksuits and shagging everything that moves.

St Austell and the surrounding area is actually incredibly beautiful, but half the inhabitants don't know what they're missing. One country road leading out from St Austell is filled with some incredible wildlife that has taken up living in the abandoned clay mines - it is in Cornwall after all.

Other notable locations include Cornwall College, Bethel, Trewoon, Moorland Road, , The train station with links to Par and Plymouth, Asda, Radio St Austell Bay and the Rugby Club.

St Austell needs to allow Chav-hunting, it would really liven up the place.

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