Tangy Porker

When you take your finger and rub it thoroughly into every crack,crevice and orifice on your body making sure that you`ve collected as much sweat and smell from the depths of the afore mentioned areas, afterwhich you take said finger and with one swift,firm motion wipe along the top lip(just under the nostrils) of the tool in question, leaving a very distinct and informative aroma multiplied in informativness if the said tool is sporting a moustache.

After deciding that Gregory had been a total twat the day before, Nigel,remembering that he hadn`t had a shower for about 2 days decided that a tangy porker was in order, especially as Gregory had elevated his toolness by sporting a moustache.

Tangy Porker

When you stick your had down your breeks, pull back your foreskin and run your thumb around your helmet and wipe off as much cheese as humanly possible.

Then rub it on the persons top lip, just clipping their nostrils as you go.

Euan's been an annoying wee dick all night, constantly looking for an argument!

Go and give him a Tangy Porker then. That will shut him up.