The Accordion Theory

The theory that states that the universe as we know it all rests on one giant accordion, played by a transcendent figure, or “god.” “The Big Bang” was actually just the accordion beginning to expand. We know that the universe is expanding, but we don’t know why. The accordion theory explains this. As they accordion expands outwards, so does the universe. Once the accordion moves back inwards, the universe will collapse, and begin to shrink. Once the accordion fully closes, the universe will be gone. Once it opens again, the universe will be recreated from the Big Bang again, and repeat everything all over in the same exact order.

History repeats itself.

Yo, The Accordion Theory actually kind of makes sense. Got more weed?