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The Dick Theory

This is when girls want to be with every douche bag an jerk in the world in other words they want to ride every dick out there before settling down with a good guy.

Good guys get left in the friend zone because of the dick theory

by Actuality June 28, 2015

2👍 3👎


dick theory

The theory that if one acts like a dick to a dick, all that results is a pile of gayness. Usually applied to internet arguements.

"You're a dick!"

"No, YOU'RE a dick!"

*Thread ruined*

IE: Dick Theory

by Dervishx5 March 8, 2007

4👍 2👎


dick's tie theory

To wear a business shirt with a pocket to avoid accidental urinating on the tie whilst sitting down to take a dump. Business shirts with pockets allows one to tuck their tie into the top pocket during excretion, avoiding potential accidental urinating on the tie. Victims of dick's tie usually need to dry clean or dispose of the tie.

The dick's tie theory was developed in late 2009 within the corporate industry after an individual accidentally urinated on his tie whilst he was dropping a turd.

Richard: Oh man, I accidentally pissed on my tie whilst I was taking a shit!!
Dazz: It's the dick's tie now! Next time you need to crap at work, dick's tie theory it up man!

by bear1000 February 10, 2011

16👍 1👎


bigger dick foreign policy theory

First proposed by George Carlin following the initiation of the Persian Gulf War in 1991; the bigger dick foreign policy theory theorizes the justification of war (or conflict in general) being based solely on the size of the aggressor's penis in comparison to the penis size of the defender. Generally, the aggressor possesses a smaller penis in comparison to the defender, and so feels compelled to attack/invade/conquer the defender in order to feel better and prove to others that he is the superior of the two, despite his smaller penis size.

When used to explain war justification, it also explains the visual similarity between rockets, bombs, and bullets, and features they share with phallic imagery, as "the need to project the penis into other peoples' affairs", and is thought to be the origin of the phrase "fucking with people".

The bigger dick foreign policy theory is usually born out of, and is very often related to, dick fear.

"You don't have to be a historian or a political scientist to see bigger dick foreign policy theory at work. It sounds like this: 'What, they have bigger dicks?! Bomb them!'"

by iAmJimmyHoffa January 26, 2014