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The Tactical Spoon

During sex, a spoon is inserted into the females ass and twisted back and forth as if trying to open a broken door knob.

"I was eating yogurt next to my girlfriend and she got ptsd from when I gave her the tactical spoon"

by Mister. Phister March 9, 2022


tactical spoon

Tactical spooning is the militarised version of the civillian term spoon or spooning;

When applied to the military, the act of tactical spooning is not a romantic exchange, but rather an act of survival and the desire to stay warm in harsh environmental conditions. This protective posture can be utilised in either the sitting or laying position.

Soldier 1: Man it's so cold...my teeth are chattering and my hands are starting to freeze....dude, we have to tactical spoon.

Soldier 2: Okay.

by Cfn. Collins May 10, 2005

1793👍 131👎


tactical spoon

The spoon that comes in an MRE. Used for assisting a healthy dump in the field.

Wow, I just took a shit and I wouldn't have made it were it not for the 'tactical spoon' I brought with me.

by ninja694evar March 1, 2007

55👍 124👎


tactical spoon

When a man utilizes the spooning position (male posterior to female, both partners in lateral decubitus position in close contact) to soften his old lady in order to accomplish a tactical mission.

John Mayer, engaging Jennifer Aniston in a tactical spoon on a loungechair at her Malibu beachfront house: "Honey, we had a great weekend together. I sure wish you could come to my next concert. Anyway, you don't mind if I have a menage a trois with Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo, right?"

by N-gu August 14, 2008

10👍 30👎


Tactical spoon

He is a tactical spoon, used in ww2

. If you throw you becum very susi

Sponsored by susi impasta potion

Tactical spoon

by Arnelio zodynelis February 3, 2022

1👍 2👎


Tactically Large Spoon

When some shitter decided to use the Comically Large Spoon from the hit vine in stealth and combat

Guy: I need a good melee
Guy 2: use the tactically large spoon
Guy: what

by aspEcts353 February 3, 2022