The asshole policy

When you meet someone you don't really care for and don't want to talk to you can implement the asshole policy by immediately portraying yourself as an asshole. The desired effect is that the other person will leave you alone.

When you meet someone that is obviously arrogant you can implement the asshole policy by coming off as an asshole before they have a chance to be an assohole first.

You: "I was at the bar last nite and this fat drunk chick started hitting on me, I had to tell her that the dress she was weraring makes her look fat to get her to leave me alone."

Friend: "Oh so you implemented the asshole policy?"

You: "Yes I certainly did!"

Example 2
Loser sitting next to you: "Hey man, watch this I'll bet I can get that hot bartender into bed tonight."

You: "Dude you couldn't get laid in a monkey whore-house if you had a sack full of bannanas." (You just put the asshole policy into effect)

asshole policy

In any given relationship you have with another person that person is bound to be an asshole at some point so you mite as well be an asshole first.

Example 1
"I knew that the car in front of me was about to cut me off so I implemented the asshole policy and sped up so he couldn't get in front of me."

Example 2
I was walking out of wal-mart the other day and this bum said "excuse me sir", I could tell he was about be an asshole and ask me for money so I put the asshole policy into effect and told him "get a fucking job" before he had a chance to say another word.