Two Shits

Over exaggeration of not caring.

I don't give two shits about you or your friends.

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Two Shits

Similar to 'one upper'. Phrase depicting someone who always needs to have gone one better. If you have had one shit that morning he/she will have done two.

Hey Bob, I totally did the biggest crap this morning

Aw... I did "TWO SHITS" shits yesterday

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two shits

Something that a lot of people refuse to give.

Person: "I could give two shits.."

Me: "But you won't, huh?"

Person: "Nope!"

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Two shits

Having a complete lack of care.

"I don't give two shits about the dolphins"

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Two shits

1. A term used to describe something you don't give.

2. A term used instead of saying "I don't give a shit."

Harry: "That hurt my feelings."

Sally: "I don't give two shits about your feelings."

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Two-Shits

One who has to top any story, one upper

"Man!, I just took a big shit! Oh yeah, well I just took two!" hence "Two-Shits"

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two-shit morning

Those mornings when your typical morning shit is just not enough. This situation arises most frequently after a night of heavy drinking or a late night burrito run.

In a typical two-shit morning, the second sequence arrives unexpectedly, making you late for work/class/court-ordered community service.

You: Sorry I'm late boss, I had one of the two-shit morning. You know how it goes.
Boss: Say no more. I was late too, also on account of a two-shit morning.

Check with your human resources office/principal/parole officer to make sure that a two-shit morning is recognized as a valid excuse for tardiness.