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A annoying neurotic housepet that craves affection like a addict craves drugs. If you start petting it, it will expect you to keep stroking it and rubbing it under the chin indefinitely. You push it off you 98 times, it crawls back on you 99 times, purring, rubbing, kneading, licking, drooling, and looking cute. A black bottomless hole of need. It sticks to you and can only be removed with force, a condition known as Cattic Cling. These episodes frequently occur when unsuspecting human target is playing a computer game or reading a book or trying to write. Putting on formal or expensive clothing that shows every single cat hair can also trigger velcro kitty behavior.
My cat has gone all velcro kitty on me and won't leave me alone.
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An outrageously clingy cat.
Needs to be touching you (or at least be by your side) at literally all times.
Will have a massive freak-out when you leave your house for any reason, or if you dare try to get some alone time.
Will make you want to get a second cat so it will bother someone else. (This is actually a good idea.)
My velcro kitty is relentless. I had to adopt another cat so she would attach to someone else.
The act of strapping a piece of velcro to one's pubic hair then proceeding to add your favorite coat. As you fuck the sjit out of her #realshit the fluids splurge onto your coat. Wear the coat to a funeral #praisegod
Henry: What is that stain on your coat? You need to wash it.
Axel: Nah I did a Velcro Kitty yesterday on some real shit