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designed by insightful people, who realized that the last 7 yrs. of life are not worth living anyway. Those are the 7 yrs. you cant make coherent sentences, and you shit yourself constantly.
"Grandpa you shit yourself again, here is a pack of camels!!!!!
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The amount of distance it takes to walk while smoking one cigarette.
Fuck going into town, that's two cigarettes away and I only have one cigarette left.
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1. A magic wand used to conjure buses. You can stand there for an hour waiting for your bus to come, but as soon as you light up a fag, it will come round the corner, forcing you to put it out.
2. Something that non-smokers frequently manage to die of cancer without ever using.
3. Something for self-righteous but somewhat timid morons to declaim and campaign against without having to feel like they're going out on a limb.
4. A drug that makes you violent and cuts your IQ in half, damages your liver, frequently causes death on the roads and in homes, destroys careers, lives and families, and costs our country millions every year in lost productivity from people who are too sick to come in to work after using too much of it the night before. Oh no wait, that's beer.
Let's see, what shall I spend my time campaigning against? Racism? No... how about religious fundamentalism? Maybe pollution or censorship... Ah, no, I've got it! Cigarettes!
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Woah, woah.. Calm down, man. I'll have your 85.5 cigarettes by next week
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A cigarette is tobacco that is pre-wrapped. A single cigarette is called a loosie, while a box of cigarettes generally contain 18 cigarettes. Cigarettes contain nicotine, which is a stimulant, relaxant, and cognitive enhancer (although nicotine is generally addictive). The problem is that cigarettes also contain over 600 cancer causing chemicals which can be bad for you when smoked (burned and inhaled). An alternative is called a vape. Vaping is inhaling a vapor with nicotine and glycerin (vegetable glycerol) and propylene glycol. Vaping is at least 95% less dangerous than smoking and, unlike nicotine patches and gum, vape is actually way more effective at helping you quit smoking. The vaping flavors help too. Cigarettes used to be cool, but now vaping is cool. Smoking and vaping is for people 18 years of age or older in some places, 21 years of age or older in other places. It's the chemicals in cigarettes that cause lung cancer, not the nicotine. If you still want to smoke, go ahead, but consider switching to vaping.
Josh: You should quit smoking Stan. Try vaping!
Tawna: Yeah Stan. Try vaping!
Stan: OK. This is my last cigarette. I will switch to vaping.
*Smokes the last newport cigarette.
*The next day
Stan: *Vapes juul
Josh: Good job Stan!
Tawna: Yeah! Good job!
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how to say "i don't give a fucking fuck" without really saying it
yeah i got yellow teeth, bad breath, one lung, no voicebox, and stage four terminal cancer.
but i don't fucking give a fuck. i'll show you, pass me my fuckin cigarettes.
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