anal clapping

The act of inserting both hands into the anus and clapping them together vigorously

Yo dad do u wanna try some anal clapping tonight? Mom said you do it well

Anal Clap

Pretty much the worst STI in existance. When a friend has hooked up with someone gross, or tells you that they think they may have an STI, one is bound by a moral duty to inform them that they have, in fact, contracted anal clap.

Symptoms include: anything they complain of. Then tell them that anal clap is worse than AIDS, and it's only going to get worse. One could also make up some more heinous symptoms, including (but not limited to) anal leakage, scabies, and loss of teeth.

1. Paul: "Bro that chick you got with last night was disgusting. You need to get checked to make sure you haven't caught anal clap off her."
Simon: "What's anal clap?"
Paul: "The worst STI in the world... Its pretty serious. And by that I mean its worse than AIDS. If your bum gets itchy tonight I'd be worried..."

2. Susan: "I'm just really worried that I might have caught an STI off that guy last week... (insert list of symptoms here)."
Dolores: "Oh dear, Susan. It sounds as though you've caught anal clap!"
Susan: "No! Anal clap is worse than AIDS! I should have known that he'd be infected with the worst STI on the planet!

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