ass ripper

1) Extremely painful shit. A very painful dump. A long and painful act on the toilette. Generally caused by lack of fibre and waiting too long to shit. A shit which may require assistance, either medically, or with a rigid spoon-like excavation tool.

2) A term used amongst well known friends, and best not used just anywhere.

1) Scott: "What took you so long in my washroom guy, there aren't any magazines in there when you come over!"
Max: "Duuuude, I couldn't go, I was squirming and standing on my fucking toes squeezing and writhing in agony. It was like I was giving a shit birth. I had a serious ass ripper!!"
Scott: "AW fuck man, not again, I had to replace my toilette last time you used it!!!! Why don't you just go straight to the fucking sewage plant guy and hang over the septic pool before you come to visit!!"

2) Best not used location example-
Max: "I would like to toast the bride whom I have had some special moments with before today - especially last night - I digress, firstly I would like to apologize for my scratchy throat, I spent the last 5 minutes screaming in the can forcing out an extreme ass ripper!"

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Jack the Ass Ripper

Little known cousin of Jack the Ripper, famous for his ability to fart on command.

Today Jack the Ass Ripper killed it at the show.

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Monkey ass ripper

When a black man poops all over white girls and keeps going until everything falls out his ass hole.

OMG my Friend Jamal is doing the Monkey ass ripper To my Friends dog.