Variant - Something to prevent anal rape.
Inmate 1: You gonn' get ass raped!
Inmate 2: Quite untrue good sir, I happen to have fastened my soap to a lengthy cord, allowing for easy retrieval in the case of dropping it in the showers. I call it... Asshole Insurance
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A trick of the skilled asshole; Asshole insurance. The insurance covers all acts of assholery by providing the victim with an assemblage of minions ready to vouch for the legitimacy of his/her actions.
For use in DnD 3.5:
Take the "Leadership" feat at LVL 7 and then "Asshole Insurance" at LVL 10 and you're all set.
What the hell? Another paycut... right before Christmas? Fucking asshole! Goddamn Mr. Smith and his asshole insurance.
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