because jesus

Used (usually sarcastically) to "explain" why homosexuality/LGBT/abortion/marijuana/brown people/citizens of countries other than the US/what have you is "bad".

Imaginary interviewer to Pat Robertson: "Why are you so opposed to the rapidly expanding normalization of non-traditional sex roles?"
Robertson: "Because Jesus."

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Because I'm Jesus

How Jesus sasses the Pharisees or makes them stfu

Pharisees: "Can you stop claiming to be God!"
Jesus: "No, I am God because I'm Jesus"
Pharisees: "We hate this guy so much"

fuck me in the ass because i love jesus

Your man is un-pleased with you, but you dont want to lose your virginity till marriage. So the best song ever was created Named "Fuck me in the ass because i love Jesus"

DID YOU HEAR SAMANTHA GOT FUCKED IN THE ASS BC SHE LOVES JESUS???
Fuck me in the ass because i love Jesus: You low key a hoe but still want to be loved

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Fuck me in the ass because I love Jesus

What I scream at my friends

“Fuck me in the ass because I love Jesus! Fuck me jerry FUCK ME”

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Fuck me in the ass because I love Jesus

I thing that I scream a lot even know I’m a atheist.

Me:”FUCK ME IN THE ASS BECAUSE I LOVE JESUS”
Friends:*laugh*

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The Pharisees hated Jesus because he told them the truth.

A way of saying "You know I'm right" when someone gets angry at you for speaking the truth. According to scripture, the Pharisees were a group of Jewish elders in Judea (the name of Israel under Roman occupation) who took every chance they could get to catch Jesus and his disciples lacking.

Virgin Woke Urbanist: Amtrak is bad! travel cross-country by air! Or on a Greyhound bus!

Chad Nerd: Actually, there's nothing wrong with Amtrak, and aside from Greyhound, they were picking up the slack during the recent airline meltdowns.

VWU: NO! SHUT UP! THAT'S NOT TRUE!

CN: The Pharisees hated Jesus because he told them the truth.

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