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blown surprise

A bar trick usually performed by a female server or bar tender on a patron that has closed their tab without tipping and hung around to bullshit with friends. At this point, the server/bar tender re-engages with the patron and precedes to tell them about the urban legend that if someone blows on one's asshole, that person can't shit. At this point, the non-tipper is so obliterated and a non-believer of the urban legend and asks to have it proven. At this point, the server/bar tender has the patron lie on their back up on the bar, on the floor, or on a stage. They then pull down their pants to expose the chocolate star and ask the non-tipper to blow. Upon the cool breeze hitting the 'ol balloon knot, the bowels are released, leaving a free swirly on the patron's face.

Yo, the other night I hung out with Jason at the Watering Hole and he brought his dumbass co-worker, Adam, with him. That mother fucker bought over $100 of booze and didn't tip our server. He then proceeded to hang around like Epstein in a prison cell. After a while, the server told him THE urban legend. And yes, he fell for it. She gave him the blown surprise and shat all over his face! It was EPIC!!

by Bobby the Bug Man September 22, 2020


blown surprise

A bar trick usually performed by a female server or bar tender on a patron that has closed their tab and hung around to bullshit with their friends. At this point, the server/bar tender re-engages with the non-tipper to tell them the legend of if you blow on one’s asshole, one is unable to shit. With that, the patron calls shenanigans and asks the server/bar tender to prove it. Without hesitation, the server has the cheap bastard lie on their back on the bar/a table/the floor, pulls down her pants to expose her balloon knot, then has the scumbag blow a sweet breeze. Upon the wind hitting the chocolate star, she releases an extrusion of warm soft-served shitty logs onto the mother fucker’s face.

Yo, the other night I hung out with a buddy at the Watering Hole and he brought his dumbass coworker with him. That mother fucker bought over $100 of booze and didn’t tip the bar tender. He then hung around like Epstein in a jail cell. Eventually the bar tender told him THE legend and as expected, he didn’t believe it and asked her to prove it. So, she gave him the blown surprise and released Thursdays meatloaf all over his face. It was epic!

by Bobby the Bug Man October 6, 2020