I now realize I haven't been properly counting the parts... So, this is whatever part we're at now.
Cain "I HAVE A CHALLENGE!"
God "Okie dokie."
Cain "I will retrieve a thing and Abel will retrieve a thing and then you will decide which of the things is the best thing!"
God "Sounds fun."
Cain "Let's go Abel." *Grabs Abel*
Abel "Ow... I'm coming... Jeez..."
*Later in the forest*
Cain "Where in the hell did Abel run off to..." 🤔
Snake "If you're looking for your brother he's already left to bring his offering to God."
Cain "Damn! I still haven't found a thing... Wait, who are you?"
Snake "My name is *Snake* Er... Shit...😮 💨 God damn it..."
Cain "You're not a snake tho-"
Snake "I KNOW 😖👌... What I am not. 😤 Ok... I heard about your little game and I'd like to help. Here. Take it." 😈
Cain "A cube?"
Snake "Yup. Cube. That idiot's first choice ALWAYS cube. With this, you'll win. Without a doubt."
Cain "Really? Great! Thanks Snake!" *runs off*
Snake "My name isn't... 😮 💨 God damn it..."
*Back at the farm*
Cain "I have returned! And here is my offering! BEHOLD!!! A CUBE!" 😁
God "Oh, well alright. That's pretty good man. Abel? Whatcha got?"
Abel "Um... Well... Orb?"
God "OH NO WAY! ORB!? Yeah that's tight. Abel wins. Definitely."
Abel "AAAYY!!"
Cain "Wh... What? How? How could I lose!?"
God "Well, I mean, if you would have brought the orb you would have won, right?"
Cain 😾 *Stares at Abel*
God "Now, you got that look in your eye that a cat gets when it's about to-"
Snake "HOW'D YOU LIKE YOUR CUBE JACKASS!? AHAHAHAHAHA! You DID choose the cube ri-HOLY SHIT!!! 😱 Did you see that guy just mangle the other dudes brain cage!? Oh! That is gruesome! Were you about to say 'fuck the shit out of somebody'? Because that... That is what that guy just did to THAT guys cranium. WOW!"
God "Aw, come on *Snake* Er..." 😳
Snake "Ohohoho! It's not *Snake* remember? Remember that thing you did? It's Snake now! Ahahahahahaha!"
God 😮 💨
Snake "I mean you had to have known right? Would the other one have killed THAT one if HE would have lost? Just let him win! God... You and your orb obsession I swear..."
God "I... Was hoping I was wrong..."