Carbarian

A portmanteau of car + barbarian. Someone who clearly got their drivers license in a box of Cracker Jacks. These are people who behave like complete assholes behind the wheel and refuse to recognize the humanity of anyone who isn’t in a car, and frequently the other drivers on the road as well.

Typical traits of carbarians:
-Always driving at 20 mph above the speed limit, even in residential areas

-Removing the mufflers from their cars for no other reason than to make more noise
-Intentionally running over cyclists and pedestrians
-Voting against anything that would be convenient to anyone other than themselves and other carbarians, thereby turning their town into a mess of freeways, traffic jams, overpasses, and parking lots for shitty chain restaurants

-Having religious objections to using their turn signals

-Driving drunk or distracted

-Owning a low mileage car
-Having way too many political bumper stickers
-Honking at non-carbarians for doing the speed limit
-Hit and runs