Peanut butter carpet

To describe someones thick arse hair.

If you imagine trying to wipe peanut butter out of carpet with a paper towel.

My arse hair is like a peanut butter carpet

carpet butter

all that creamy shit that accumulates in your pubous, especially after coitus and on a particularly hairy individual

musty mf 1: "dude....I needa shave.... every time I have sex, I get mad carpet butter"
musty mf 2: "are you serious bro? you should use my coupon code for dollar shave club"